"When Marriage and Mercy Collide"
The Power of the Gospel in Marriage
Choosing Forgiveness
The Gospel Hope of Staying Together
November 08, 2009; Brad Bigney
Three Steps to move towards forgiveness
Not forgetting what they did to you, but remembering what Christ did for you on the cross and extending that towards them regardless of feelings
I. You Start by Looking Past the Other Person and Back to God
Forgiveness has nothing to do with us and everything to do with God
>He is the author of forgiveness
Parables were meant to be a punch in the stomach--NOT "storytime"
Matthew 18:21-36 (HCSB) the struggle with forgiveness isn't new
Then Peter came to Him and said, "Lord, how many times could my brother sin against me and I forgive him? As many as seven times?" [forgiving three times was generous according to Jewish tradition at the time]
"I tell you, not as many as seven," Jesus said to him, "but 70 times seven. For this reason, the kingdom of heaven can be compared to a king who wanted to settle accounts with his slaves. When he began to settle accounts, one who owed 10,000 talents [one denarii was one day's wages, one talent was twenty years wages. Approx $9.6 BILLION today!] was brought before him. Since he had no way to pay it back, his master commanded that he, his wife, his children, and everything he had be sold to pay the debt.
"At this, the slave fell facedown before him and said, 'Be patient with me, and I will pay you everything!' Then the master of that slave had compassion, released him, and forgave him the loan. [We are this slave]
"But that slave went out and found one of his fellow slaves who owed him 100 denarii[not pocket change, three months wages]. He grabbed him, started choking him, and said, 'Pay what you owe!'
"At this, his fellow slave fell down and began begging him, 'Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.' But he wasn't willing. On the contrary, he went and threw him into prison until he could pay what was owed. [>>Forgiveness is hard enough for Christians who struggle with this--it is impossible without Christ<<] When the other slaves saw what had taken place, they were deeply distressed and went and reported to their master everything that had happened.
"Then, after he had summoned him, his master said to him, 'You wicked slave! I forgave you all that debt because you begged me. Shouldn't you also have had mercy on your fellow slave, as I had mercy on you? ' And his master got angry and handed him over to the jailers until he could pay everything that was owed. So My heavenly Father will also do to you if each of you does not forgive his brother from his heart."
This is a kick in the head...
If you don't understand the depth of YOUR OWN sin against God and how much He's forgiven you, then you'll never have what it takes to forgive other people around you.
Ephesians 4:30-32 (HCSB) "just as"
"And don't grieve God's Holy Spirit, who sealed you for the day of redemption. All bitterness, anger and wrath, insult and slander must be removed from you, along with all wickedness. And be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving one another, just as God also forgave you in Christ."
MUST DO
Colossians 3:13b (HCSB) "just as"
"...if anyone has a complaint against another. Just as the Lord has forgiven you, so also you must forgive."
Matthew 18:33 (NKJV) "just as"
"Should you not also have had compassion on your fellow servant [slave], just as I had pity on you? ' "
Give to others (horizontally) what you have received from God (vertically). "Marriage is meant to be a unique matrix for this display of God's grace." This Momentary Marriage, John Piper, p. 47
Forgiven people forgive others. Period.
II. You Stop Expecting Payment and You Choose to Absorb the Cost of Their Sin
I Peter 2:9-10, 21-25 (HCSB)
"But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for His possession, so that you may proclaim the praises of the One who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light. Once you were not a people [aliens, enemies, strangers--rightfully objects of His wrath], but now you are God's people; you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy.
"For you were called to this, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you should follow in His steps. He did not commit sin, and no deceit was found in His mouth; when reviled, He did not revile in return; when suffering, He did not threaten, but committed Himself to the One who judges justly. He Himself bore our sins in His body on the tree, so that, having died to sins, we might live for righteousness; by His wounding you have been healed. For you were like sheep going astray, but you have now returned to the shepherd and guardian of your souls."
True forgiveness looks the other person's sin in the face--and then absorbs the cost of that sin by the power of God's abundant grace.
Giving what is undeserved and unexpected. It is HARD, but possible through Christ.
Forgiveness--This is who we are
FORGIVEN SINNERS FORGIVE SIN!
•So why do so many Christians struggle with forgiving others?
1. Many claiming Christ aren't Christians--proven by lack of forgiveness [Dead people go around refusing to forgive]
2. You struggle because you're not feasting on the cross
•Are you feasting on the cross of Christ regularly in your life?
[Communion.]
III. You Refuse to Let All the Sin in Your Relationship Define or Defile the Whole Thing
You work hard to see past it, and to see grace and mercy in the midst of it all
Extended quote from: This Momentary Marriage, John Piper, p. 59 Will you focus on sin or on forgiveness?
Closing song: Mighty to Save
Everyone needs compassion
A love that's never failing
Let mercy fall on me
Everyone needs forgiveness
The kindness of a Savior
The hope of nations
(Chorus:)
Savior
He can move the mountains
My God is mighty to save
He is mighty to save
Forever
Author of Salvation
He rose & conquered the grave
Jesus conquered the grave
So take me as You find me
All my fears & failures
Fill my life again
I give my life to follow
Everything I believe in
Now I surrender (I surrender)
(Chorus:) (2x)
Savior
He can move the mountains
My God is mighty to save
He is mighty to save
Forever
Author of Salvation
He rose & conquered the grave
Jesus conquered the grave
(Bridge:) (2x)
Shine Your light &
Let the whole world see
We're singing
For the glory
Of the risen King
Jesus
(Chorus)
You're the Savior
You can move the mountains
Lord You are mighty to save
You are mighty to save
Forever
Author of Salvation
You rose & conquered the grave
Yes You conquered the grave
Mighty To Save lyrics © Hillsong Publishing
No comments:
Post a Comment