"When Marriage and Mercy Collide"
The Power of the Gospel in Marriage
Adding Mercy
The Exceptional Sweetener that Makes All the Difference
November 01, 2009; Brad Bigney
Mercy, sweetener, needed for whole marriage, not just start
I. Mercy Makes All the Difference in Your Marriage
Mercy = kind, forgiving treatment to relieve distress of others and cancel their debts (Paul Tripp)
Direct correlation between mercy dispensed and joy received
Love not just a feeling (c.f. loving enemies below)
Luke 6:27-38 (HCSB)
"But I say to you who listen: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If anyone hits you on the cheek, offer the other also. And if anyone takes away your coat, don't hold back your shirt either. Give to everyone who asks from you, and from one who takes away your things, don't ask for them back. Just as you want others to do for you, do the same for them. If you love those who love you, •what credit is that to you?• Even sinners love those who love them. If you do what is good to those who are good to you, •what credit is that to you?• Even sinners do that. And if you lend to those from whom you expect to receive, •what credit is that to you?• Even sinners lend to sinners to be repaid in full. But love your enemies, do what is good, and lend, expecting nothing in return. [c.f. Ephesians 3 (not comprehend the love of God)] Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High. For He is gracious to the ungrateful and evil. Be merciful, just as your Father also is merciful.
"Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Give, and it will be given to you; a good measure-pressed down, shaken together, and running over-will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you."
James 2:13
In the original Greek "shown" is DO
(HCSB)
"For judgment is without mercy to the one who hasn't shown mercy. Mercy triumphs over judgment."
(ESV)
"For judgment is without mercy to one who has shown no mercy. Mercy triumphs over judgment."
God DID mercy, sending His Son to the cross
Hebrews 4:15-16 (HCSB)
For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but One who has been tested in every way as we are, yet without sin. Therefore let us approach the throne of grace with boldness, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us at the proper time.
The mercy from Christ should show up in the lives of those around you
II. Your Mercy Dries Up without a Fresh Appreciation & Awareness of God's Mercy to You
Humility and Gratitude!
Have an eye for mercy in Scripture--it should be a speedbump that slows you down
>Don't ever "get over" mercy
Lamentations 3:19-23, 31-32 (HCSB)
Remember my affliction and my homelessness, the wormwood *and the poison. I continually remember them and have become depressed. Yet I call this to mind, and therefore I have hope:
ח Khet
Because of the LORD's faithful love we do not perish, for His mercies never end. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness!
כ Kaf
For the Lord will not reject us forever. Even if He causes suffering, He will show compassion according to His abundant, faithful love.
*Wordweb: Any of several low composite herbs of the genera Artemisia or Seriphidium
Matthew 18:31-34 (HCSB)
"When the other slaves saw what had taken place, they were deeply distressed and went and reported to their master everything that had happened. "Then, after he had summoned him, his master said to him, 'You wicked slave! I forgave you all that debt because you begged me. Shouldn't you also have had mercy on your fellow slave, as I had mercy on you? ' And his master got angry and handed him over to the jailers until he could pay everything that was owed."
[See John MacArthur's message on the translation of slave in the NT--only the HCSB, among major translations, gets it right, like in this passage. They are not "servants."]
God takes this seriously, mercy isn't optional. He is a God of mercy
His mercy TO us makes a claim ON us
>Objects of mercy are to become channels of mercy
III. Your [habit of doing] Mercy Will Empower You to Forbear
Colossians 3:12-13 (HCSB)
Therefore, God's chosen ones, holy and loved, put on heartfelt compassion [It is a choice. Not us, but Christ in us.], kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, accepting one another and forgiving one another if anyone has a complaint against another. Just as the Lord has forgiven you, so also you must forgive.
>A. Showing Mercy Means You're Willing to Suffer Because of Their Sin
You don't walk away or give up. Your life WILL be troubled by their sin
>B. Showing Mercy Means You're Willing to Wait
Doing Mercy = living with a process mentality, not an event
I Corinthians 13:4 "Live is patient, love is kind..."
Are you extending what is undeserved and unexpected?
We closed with this song. Great lyrics!
"How Deep the Father's Love for Us"
by Stuart Townend
How deep the Father's love for us,
How vast beyond all measure
That He should give His only Son
To make a wretch His treasure
How great the pain of searing loss,
The Father turns His face away
As wounds which mar the chosen One,
Bring many sons to glory
Behold the Man upon a cross,
My sin upon His shoulders
Ashamed I hear my mocing voice,
Call out among the scoffers
It was my sin that held Him there
Until it was accomplished
His dying breath has brought me life
I knoww that it is finished
I will not boast in anything
No gifts, no power, no wisdom
But I will boast in Jesus Christ
His death and resurrection
Why should I gain from His reward?
I cannot give an answer
But this I know with all my heart
His wounds have paid my ransom
~Matt
-- Posted from my iPhone
(c) 2009 iWolff Ltd.
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