Apparently I'm too stupid to make financial decisions for myself. Apparently my family (to be fair not all of them, for now I just know it is my oldest brother, and my sister and brother-in-law here) must conspire behind my back and make demands of me. All my earlier musings about internet access are currently moot. I was stupid (in retrospect) enough to mention that I was thinking about procuring internet access for myself (because I do not want to walk across the street to get on-line EACH AND EVERY TIME!!!) to my brother-in-law.
After cautioning me that "it was my choice" he proceeded to dictate terms to me. Presumably this entire plan is designed to help me save money, which means that it is really about forcing me to do what they want--because letting me do what I want would be "enabling me." If I go and get internet service I cannot keep the cell phone I have under his plan--I have to give it back. This would mean I would have to fork over even more money to procure my own cell phone and plan. With as much as I'm going to be gone during the week I consider it essential to have a cell phone so that I can remain in contact--especially with the museum in relation to events. I also use the alarm on my phone each and every day, very often multiple times a day to remind me of various matters.
Needless to say I am very, VERY upset. First of all there was absolutely no discussion, it was simply a dictate handed out from on high. I must do this, or else! I'm just annoyed that I cannot make my own choices. It should be MY CHOICE if I want to work an extra night a week so that I have the money to pay for my phone bill. Or if I cut back on food, or unnecessary driving--or anything, to pay for internet access. Secondly I can give several good reasons why I would want to get my own landline and internet connection, but again none of them matter because there was no possibility of discussion, just a decree. I would like to have free incoming calls and free calls within Cincinnati, but with my cell phone being my only phone that isn't possible. I don't want to never see my sister's family again, but I do not want to be at their house to make every local phone call or to go on-line every time. I want to start to live more of my life on my own.
Oh, and just as I knew would be the case I cannot get the signal from my brother-in-law's wireless network in my apartment. He has the idea to procure a "booster," to enhance the signal. However, this would cost around fifty dollars, and I would likely need a new wireless card. Plus we'd have to hope this all worked before things were purchased, and that the signal would go through the huge tree in the yard. I'm not incredibly optimistic. Too, I can just see them saying "wait six months to buy the booster, until you're more financially stable."
Well I've cut back on on-line time this week as I'm working like crazy AND unpacking my stuff. I don't like it, and I can't function this way. If I'm this busy (or nearly so) I won't be able to pack up my laptop and run across the street every time I want to go on-line. I need better e-mail access than that for the museum, and I know they don't want me over at six in the morning, or to come over at eleven every night. I know I don't want to leave my apartment at eleven every night after I get home just so that I can check e-mail. I want to do that in my own living room as I fix my dinner or relax and watch a movie. But again, I'm apparently too stupid to be allowed to make that decision myself.
So yes, here endeth a very angry post. No, I don't regret any words that I've typed. In fact perhaps they should have been harsher. I'm very annoyed.
~Matt
PS Besides the previously (in my internet access musing post) mentioned $37.00 a month it would cost me $30 a month for the cheapest Sprint plan--but if I wanted to enjoy the free Sprint-to-Sprint calling that I now enjoy it would cost me $40 a month. :(
3 comments:
Wow, when I first read your blog I was disappointed and angry with you. I went thru line by line and refuted most of what you had written. I did not post it because I knew this was a matter that I should pray about and seek Godly wisdom. As I sat in church today the pastor had us look up Luke 9:51-56. On his way to Jerusalem Jesus has James and John go into a village of the Samaritans to prepare for him. But the Samaritans did not receive him. Verse 54-56 says, When His disciples James and John saw this, they said, "Lord, do You want us to command fire to come down from heaven and consume them?" But He turned and rebuked them, [and said, "You do not know what kind of spirit you are of; 56for the Son of Man did not come to destroy men's lives, but to save them."] And they went on to another village. I ask forgiveness for my anger at you. Laurie and I would like to sit down and discuss any grievances you feel you have with us. Matt, we have opened our home and lives to you and only desire that you become a strong Christian man furthering the kingdom.
http://www.narcissisticabuse.com/verbalabuse.html
A relevent scripture to address this situation: James 1:19-20 - My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.
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