4YO: “It has the Misty Mountains!”
*camping in the rain*
8YO: “What about Rivendell?”
Dwarves: “Trolls!”
8YO: “Oops.”
When Elrond looked at Orchrist and Glamdring I asked if they remembered where they were made.
8YO: “Yes. Where Ungoliant was…”
Me: “The hidden city of…”
6YO: “Gondolin!!”
When the goblins called Orchrist and Glamdring by their elven names there was an objection!
8YO: “No, they didn’t call them the real names, they called them their names!”
Me: “Do you remember their names for the swords?”
8YO: “Beater and Biter are what the goblins called them.”
6YO: “Goblins are scary!”
Bilbo: “What’s this?”
Me: “What is that?”
8YO: “A ring. THE ring.”
As the riddle contest is about to start I heard, “Daddy, [it is] Gollum!” from the four year old.
Before Gollum finished asking one riddle the eight year old piped up with the solution, “that one’s time!”
My wife came to join us and the four year old told her “Gollum has precious.”
As Gollum paddles off at the end of the contest.
8YO: “Doesn’t he guess it (three guesses first)?”
Gollum: “It knows the way in, it must know the way out.”
8YO: “I love this, he actually leads his way to it.”
When Bilbo was telling Gandalf and the dwarves of his escape the four year old had to point out his favorite character: “Mommy, that’s Gandalf! There’s Gandalf in dis!”
*eagles set down party down at the edge of Mirkwood*
8YO: “Didn’t they drop them at the Carrock?”
Me: “Yep.”
8YO: “What about Beorn? What about Beorn? Did they skip Beorn?”
*dwarves walk through Mirkwood*
4YO: “I think dem are tired.”
My wife: “Would you be tired?”
4YO: “Yeah.”
*Bilbo climbs above the Mirkwood canopy*
4YO: “Sixty-hundred butterflies! Sixty-hundred. See there is! Sixty-hundred!”
After Bilbo woke up with a spider attacking him one noticed an issue.
8YO: “They skipped the lights where they saw the feast!”
*watching invisible Bilbo walk around*
6YO: “I think why you see him faintly so you can see where he goes.”
Bilbo (barrel rider): “Oh stop complaining, I never promised you first class accommodations.”
8YO: “Is he talking to himself?”
Me: “Who’s in the barrel?”
8YO: “Wasn’t the barrel he was on empty in the book?”
Bilbo: “Smaug…” (pronounced like smog”
8YO: “It’s Smaug!” (Pronouncing ‘ow’ as in ‘now.’)
Smaug (to Bilbo): “You have nice manners for a thief and a liar.”
8YO (indignant): “He’s the big thief!”
*Smaug throws temper tantrum atop hoard*
8YO: “Does it show the big bare spot he has?”
*view of Lake-town just before Smaug attacks*
8YO: “I thought you couldn’t see the end of the Long Lake.”
8YO: “How long do dragons live?”
Me: “A very long time.”
8YO: “As long as dwarves?”
Me: “Longer.”
Once Smaug died I joked “That’s it, the end.”
8YO: “No it isn’t. There’s still the Battle of Five Armies!”
*Bilbo leads dwarves to the entrance of the Lonely Mountain*
8YO: “What about his armor thing?”
Me: “His Mithril coat?”
8YO: “Yes, his Mithril coat.”
*Bard and Thranduil walk off*
8YO: “Where is the Arkenstone? When does he give up the Arkenstone?”
Bilbo: “A battle of three armies?”
6YO: “The orcs arrive and then the eagles!”
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*close up on Thranduil*
8YO: “That’s not how I draw elves. I draw elves as people with tall ears.”
8YO: “What about his Mithril coat?”
Bard: “The eagles.”
8YO: “Yes the eagles. The battles of five armies. Everybody hates goblins. All the good guys hate goblins. I hope more goblins died than the rest of the people.”
After the battle Gandalf said that only seven of thirteen lived and soon it would be six.
8YO: “I thought it was ten…. What about the Arkenstone? I thought it was ten that survived. What about the Arkenstone? When are we going to see that?”
Gandalf: “Smaug is gone…”
8YO: “It’s Smaug!”
*closeup on Bag End*
8YO: “When’s the auction?”
*ring gleams on Bilbo’s mantle*
8YO: “It’s the One!”
8YO: “It’s not as good as Lord of the Rings. It had lots of mistakes. It was missing stuff.”
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