*opening scene of mountains*
4YO: “Are those the Misty Mountains?”
Me: “Yes, or the White Mountains.”
6YO: “Why did Gollum have to come!”
8YO: “He’s a big part of it, remember?”
Gollum: “…swear on the Precious.”
8YO: “He’s supposed to say BY the Precious.”
*Orcs cut down trees*
8YO: “It’s really bad to cut down Fangorn Forest!”
*Dunlendings swear to follow Sauroman*
8YO: “They don’t know what is coming. That was a bad choice.”
Eomer: “If we don’t defend our lands Saruman will take them.”
Grima: “That’s a lie.”
6YO & 8YO (in unison): “Wormtongue!”
Eomer: “How long since Sauroman bought you?”
8YO: “Wasn’t it Gandalf who said that?”
Orc: “Looks like meats back on the menu!”
8YO: “Does that mean they’re eating the Hobbits? Oh, they’re eating their own kind.”
*Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli are given Hasufel and Arod*
8YO: “Didn’t they offer them three horses and they took two?”
*they ride towards Fangorn*
6YO: “Hey Gimli, you’re supposed to be feeling sick.”
Aragorn: “…their hands were bound.”
8YO: “One of them wasn’t… What about eating the Lembas? They forgot about it.”
Aragorn: “They went into Fangorn Forest.”
Gimli: “What madness drove them there?
8YO: “It’s a good forest!”
My wife: “It depends on who you are.”
8YO: “Oh, right.”
*Merry and Pippin climb up what they think is a tree but turns out to be an ent*
8YO: “This isn’t how they met Treebeard.”
*Treebeard drops Merry and Pippen before Gandalf the White*
8YO: “This is totally unbooklike!”
Gandalf: *whistles*
8YO: “Is he calling Shadowfax? They missed the part where their horses were missing.”
Watching the scene where the tree traps Merry and Pippin it sounded just like Old Man Willow in the old forest and Treebeard rebuking it sounded just like Tom Bombadil talking to him.
4YO: “Daddy, why is Treebeard a tree?”
Me: “He’s not, he’s an ent.”
*Grima leaves Edoras*
6YO: “I know where he is going. Mor…”
8YO: “No he isn’t. He’s going to Isengard.”
6YO: “Oh right.”
8YO: “Is Isengard named after the river Isen?”
Me: “Yes.”
*Éowyn sings*
6YO: “She knows Elvish??”
8YO: “No, that is her own language.”
Saruman: “Gandalf the White. Gandalf the Fool.”
6YO: “NO! You’re Saruman the Stupid!”
Saruman: “The world of men will fall.”
6YO: “But he’s a man!”
Me: “No, he’s a Maia.”
8YO: “Like Gandalf and Melian.”
Sméagol: “Leave now and never come back.”
Gollum: “NO!”
6YO: “He’s fighting against himself.”
*Faramir and company attack*
6YO: “Who’s attacking?”
8YO: “The men of Gondor. Yes. I think Gondor’s the South Kingdom.”
*Éowyn gives Aragorn stew*
8YO: “What kind of stew is it?”
Me: “Not the greatest.”
Aragorn: “87”
8YO: “How old do they live?”
Me: “He lives to be 210.”
6YO: “Because he’s descended from a half-elven that decided to be a man.”
Aragorn: “This is a dream.”
Arwen: “Then it is a good dream.”
*they kiss*
6YO: “Eww. That is definitely a dream.”
*they kiss again*
6YO: “Why does he have to have these dreams?”
4YO: “They kiss to marry.”
8YO: “They’re not married yet, not until Return of the King.”
Éowyn: “Where is the woman that gave you that [necklace]?”
Aragorn: “She is sailing to the undying lands with all her kin.”
8YO: “She isn’t!”
*wargs attack*
8YO: “AHHH! That isn’t in the books!! They’re skipping so much.”
*Legolas swings onto Gimli’s horse.”
8YO: “Nobody can do that!”
Me: “Remember Beren’s leap?”
8YO: “Oh yeah.”
6YO: “Does the king survive?”
8YO: “Of course.”
6YO: “I don’t mean Aragorn.”
Gimli: “That one counts for me.”
8YO: “This isn’t where they have their contest.”
*Legolas looks over the cliff where Aragorn fell*
6YO (worried): “Does Aragorn survive?”
8YO: “Yes!”
[Surprisingly there was no comment about this not being in the book]
*Aragorn floats to shore*
6YO: “Is he dead?”
8YO: “NO!”
*Arwen leaves Rivendell*
6YO: “Why is she going?”
8YO: “She isn’t.”
*Frodo and Sam’s blindfolds are removed in Henneth Annûn*
8YO (excited): “The waterfall!”
*Treebeard walks with Merry and Pippin*
4YO: “That really is called Treebeard!”
*other ents gather for entmoot*
4YO: “That is a lot of Treebeards!”
*Éowyn complains to Aragorn that she isn’t allowed to fight*
6YO: “They’re not allowed to marry. They won’t marry!”
4YO (ornery voice): “Yes them will.”
*elves approach Helm’s Deep*
8YO: “Are they from Gondor?”
My wife: “Do they look like they’re from Gondor?”
8YO: “No.”
*army of orcs approach Helm’s Deep*
6YO: “THAT LOOKS LIKE A CITY LIT UP!!”
*Legolas shoots and giant ladder falls off the keep of Helm’s Deep into the Saruman’s army*
6YO: “Are those all Orcs?”
Me: “Yes.”
6YO: *hysterical delighted laughter*
*ents exit Fangorn*
My wife: “They can move fast when they want.”
6YO: “They can move faster than they talk*
*Frodo, Sam, and Gollum bought into Osgiliath*
8YO: “They weren’t brought into [the city]! They were let free!”
*Huorns begin to destroy orcs*
8YO: “That’s for killing all their friends.”
6YO: “KILL ALL THE ORCS!” *evil laughter*
8YO: “[Faramir] didn’t tell them ‘don’t drink from the Morgul Vale!’ “
*Sam and Frodo walk through Ithilin*
6YO: “Why don’t they put the hoods on?”
8YO: “Thank you for reading the book before this or we wouldn’t notice mistakes. Or we’d think the book had mistakes.”
*end credits roll*
8YO: “Can we pleeeeease watch Return of the King?”
6YO: “Please! Pretty please!”
Me: “No, that is for next week. Plus you’d be up until after midnight if we started it now.”
No comments:
Post a Comment